Diogenes’ in the DR

I ran into Diogenes’ last night. He was being led through the streets of Luperon by little Luppy.
“What’s with this place?” he exclaimed. “I took a taxi here. We agreed on a price. When we arrived the driver demanded more.” 
“Did he say why?” I asked, carefully avoiding his lamp.
“He claimed it took him longer than he thought.”
“It’s the DR” I shrugged.
The stories are endless. Any perceived crack or opening is eagerly exploited by our keepers. They ought to stick a law school here. 
I have personally witnessed countless frauds. A woman I know let a local braid her daughter’s hair. The charge (by DR standards) was exorbitant. Alas, the woman had broken the cardinal rule; “always agree on the price first”. (When they try to change it, you at least have a basis.) A few days later one of the braids unraveled. She returned to have it repaired. 
“I’ll need to redo the rest.” the girl explained. “It was dark when I did them before. I couldn’t see well.”
When she was done she demanded a second full payment. The mother was livid. She refused to pay. The hairdresser wouldn’t back down and threatened to call the police. They went back n’ forth. But Mom ended up paying most of it. When dad found out he was furious. He started out to find the girl until someone mentioned that she carried a knife and knew how to use it.
Another guy rented a local’s motorcycle for a week. It kept breaking down. A group of us were in the bar above the street when he attempted to return it. He had paid up front and wanted a refund. We all just shook our heads. That doesn’t happened here. Ever.
Last week I rented a taxi for the day. It was a set price. En route, the driver asked where we were headed. When I responded he said it would cost more.
“That’s further than I expected” he explained. “It takes more fuel.”
“It doesn’t matter where we go” I countered. “I have you for the day. If I want to drive around Luperon for eight hours we’ll use the same amount of gas!”
But he had glimpsed an opening and wasn‘t about to abandon it. I finally agreed to buy him lunch which settled things.
A couple of guys thought they found a way to avoid these scams. They rented a car from a licensed agency. When they returned it, the manager demanded more money in spite of the written contract. They still can’t figure out why. But it’s going to the police.
I should add that not everyone here is like this. I frequent a number of local places where I’m treated fairly. But it happens enough to be pandemic. 
I have been wondering how all this got started. I think I’ve discovered the answer; tipping. It is not done here. You pay the stated price and that’s it. But Americans like to carry their habits with them, despite the confusion they might cause. I vehemently discussed this over lunch with a charming woman from Los Angeles.
“Don’t you see the pattern you’re creating?” I argued. “You’re leaving free money on the table. The restaurateurs tell their friends we have so much money that we give it away. So, of course, the locals either charge us more or ask for it outright. They may even think they’re doing us a favor!”
“But I only leave 10%” was her reply. She had tipped all of her life and, by God, she was going to do it here. So the rip-offs continue.
My favorite scam happened only yesterday. I was sitting in our local, basically honest, hang-out eavesdropping on a Scottish family seriously drinking at the next table.
“We will never go back there again” they told the elderly couple seated next to me. “They charged us fifteen dollars for a beer and three cokes!”
“Where was that?” I butted in.
“Pichichi’s” they replied. “Just down the street.”
“That’s impossible” I cried. “That’s Freddy’s bar (from Los Normans). They’re the most honest family in town!”
“Well it happened.” they answered with a touch of belligerence. “There was no mistake. The waitress spoke perfect English.”
“Hold it” I said. “Pichichi’s doesn’t have waitresses. It’s self-service.”
We figured out that the girl who does the braids had been sitting there when the family showed up. She immediately took their order and then their money, easily pocketing eleven dollars in the process. You gotta’ admire her chutzpah. Someone should tell Goldman Sachs about her.
Back on the darkening streets, I was eager to return home before the night’s debauchery began. Diogenes’ and I shook hands and parted ways. I watched him follow Luppy down the dimly lit lane. They stepped into a doorway and emerged with a bottle of rum. A young lady soon appeared. They conversed for awhile, then the three of them continued on, eventually disappearing into the shadows. As I turned to go, my toe banged something hard. I watched the rusted lamp spin across the street and smash against the gutter. I was lucky I hadn’t tripped over the damn thing.